Bachelor Recap: Sean Goes Tropical

Sean and the 6 women take a seaplane to St Croix. Who’s left? Lesley, AshLee, Des, Catharine, Tierra,  Lindsay. He is optimistic his wife is in this batch. Tierra starts the episode off the right way by making sure her bed is nowhere near anyone else’s. AshLee gets the first one-on-one date for the week. Tierra calls her a cougar because she’s 32 years old. Relax bro. Not everyone wants to be married by 24 (me included).

Sean picks AshLee up in this weird salmon-y pink colored top. OMG they’re on a catamaran. I was on the SAME boat in Costa Rica for a 5 hour excursion where I proceeded to almost vomit from sea-sickness.. but anyway, AshLee doesn’t seem concerned as she strips down to her bikini. Wait, her parents abandoned her? When did she reveal this? I missed it. Someone fill me in please!

The girls gossip about how much they hate Tierra and they hope AshLee tells him. Cut to the them on the beach and Sean asks about drama. AshLee tells him how it is about how it’s her vs. the house and different she acts around them then she does around Sean. It’s clear that she’s being honest with him and not just being a catty bitch. They make out on the beach. Sigh.

The next date card arrives for Tierra who gets to explore the town of St. Croix around the town. Obviously she doesn’t seem excited because she doesn’t want her make-up to drip off her face? Gurllll relax. Lesley M said it best when she said “I hate that bitch.” Preach. We all hate that bitch.

Back to AshLee and Sean and their romantic beach dinner. Sean seems like he already decided he wants to meet her family but she wants to get one more thing off her chest. Okay, so the story is that 15 years ago when she was in highschool with her adopted parents and was having a hard time and she got married at 17. Is that even legal? They were dating 2 years and married for a year in HIGHSCHOOL. Wow. Sean is thinking “that shit cray”. I mean I get that she had issues with her mom, but was getting married really the right way to handle it? I guess at 17 it seems like the only way out.. I don’t know.. I’m torn about this. Sean doesn’t seem to care too much. “I think you’re perfect the way you are”. Cute. And then AshLee screams at the top of her lungs “I love Sean”. Too soon? There’s still 5 other girls left. They usually wait until at earliest top 4 or 3. But top 6? Ballsy move AshLee.

Next up: Tierra meets up with Sean who is wearing a much better colored shit today. Phew. They go shopping together and get matching necklaces. They wind up in the middle of this wild mardi-gras like parade and Tierra clearly drops it like its hot but it’s edited out and you just see her bopping around the people on stilts. Sean asks what’s been going on. She says with what? As if there’s anything else REALLY going on in your life besides this show and the house and all the drama you’re causing. But okay lets play dumb and tell Sean how the girls won’t accept you. Liar liar pants on fire. Bitch. At dinner Tierra tells him she felt distant from him during the day and asked him why. He tells her that the drama in the house is making him uneasy. So she tells him shes falling in love with him to try to get into his good graces.

(cut to the house Catharine, Desire, Lindsay gets the group date. And Lesley gets the final one on one. why do they interrupt dates like this? not sure)

Sean wakes the girls up and takes pics of the girls fresh outta bed without showering and without makeup. Rude, but hilarious. Catharine says “I just need to pee and go”. My kinda girl, roughin’ it without makeup. This is cute, he wants them to see the sunrise from the most far east part of the US – making them the first people in America to see the sunrise. Fucking awesome. AND MIMOSAS? #dreamcometrue. They roadtrip from one side of the island to the other to see the sunrise on the other side and they are making a couple stops in between. Great date idea. Props producers.

(Lesley’s date card arrives – I hope our love stands the test of time)

Des makes the most of her time and makes sure to grab shotgun and take time away from the other 2 ladies. There’s a rose on the date and obviously they all think they deserve it. He takes time with each of them to decide who to get that rose and ultimately whos family he wants to meet the most. Catharine’s time with him is very depressing, again. Last week we find out someone died in front of her. This week she tells Sean if he comes home with her he won’t be meeting her dad because when she was 14 he tried to commit suicide in front of her and her sister and he got taken away from her. How is this woman a functioning human being with all this fucked up shit that goes on in her life? I break a nail and I’m all FUCK EVERYTHING IS MIZ and she goes through all this and is still the cutest most bubbly girl of the group. Props to you Catharine. I like you more and more each week. Lindsay gets the rose.

Final date is Lesley’s. Her skirt is so friggen adorable. At the start of this date, Sean thinks he has stronger feelings for the other girls. Lesley now thinks she’s one of those foolish girls saying she’s falling in love with him already. I mean, the other 5 girls said it so you might as well.. But she chickens out during the day part of the date. Sean can see she’s still nervous and wants them to move past that a bit. Mmmm slow kiss.. that was hot.. she clearly thinks so too.

Sean has a sit down with his sister. He can see the possibility of marriage with all of them, which is an issue that none stand out. She raises her valid concerns about picking the wrong girl who doesn’t reveal all of herself to him. In the midst of that, AshLee and Tierra drama arises. I fastforward this on and off because I’m bored. Sorry guys – it’s really not worth writing about. Blah blah blah sabotage..blah blah blah you’re rude, I’ve had enough, blah blah I have a sparkle (what?), I can’t control my eyebrows (what?!)…Sean grabs Tierra to meet his sister right after her big shabang with AshLee. So she’s obviously there crying like a fucking bitch and stops the SECOND he walks in. He says he wanted her to meet his sister BUT IN A TWIST OF EVENTS HE SENDS HER HOME. SMART MAN SEAN. SMART MAN. Bye bye crazy bitch. See ya at the reunion show.

He tells all the girls Tierra went home tonight.  They all smile (just like we did).  They did NOT smile when he said there was going to be no cocktail party because he already made his decision for the week. So right to the rose ceremony.

Lindsay already has one.
Des. Catharine. AshLee.

That means goodbye to Lesley M. Super sad. I feel like I had her pegged in my top 4. Catharine freaks out because she thought he and her had more in common that she and him do and now she’s not sure SHE’s what he wants. Cath – you got a rose. Relax. Lesley is upset and heartbroken. Limo rides out.

Okay so next week is hometowns. These are the make or break dates and my favorites to watch all season. So excited for next week!!

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