Living a double life is totally possible! According to Miley Stewart, you can just put on a blonde wig and pretend to be a famous pop star and no one will know the difference. WRONG. I once put on a blonde wig to dress up as Marilyn Monroe for Halloween and no one thought I was a different person. Lesson learned: a blonde wig is NOT a clever disguise. Also, why don’t you try playing a show at Madison Square Garden on a Thursday night and then flying back across the country to make it to school by 8 a.m. the next morning. Yeah, probably not as easy as Miley makes it seem!
For those of you who know me well, you ‘re well aware of the fact that I’m a Disney freak. In case you didn’t know, here’s the evidence to prove it. I’m the first to admit that I’ve spent a little too much time analyzing everything Disney: from movies, to television shows, to actors and singers, and everything in between. The only other person I know who loves Disney in this way is my friend and coworker (and author of this blog), Cara Friedman. Cara and I have spend a little too much time getting nostalgic over our favorite Disney classics, talking about which characters are just like us, and even gossiping about the crazy lives of stars such as Demi and Selena (this one sometimes ends in a argument—we’re VERY protective of these girls!). After reading Cara’s post about the wonderful lessons we learned from Disney, I got inspired to come up with a few backwards lessons of my own. Disney, you’re fab, but be careful of these mixed messages:
Rodents make great housekeepers and friends. The mice in Cinderella make her a dress and sing her a song. The rats in Enchanted help Gisele clean Robert’s apartment. News flash, girls! Cindy, the rats are there because you live in an attic. Gisele, there’s a reason Robert starts yelling. Not only would I freak out if I ever saw a rodent in my apartment, but I think I would actually have to move out for a few days. That is absolutely disgusting and unacceptable.
Words speak louder than actions and you don’t have to mean what you say. This is a huge pet peeve of mine. In Camp Rock 2, Mitchie and Shane get into an argument. Then they break out into a song called Fire and Rain, which is all about how they can’t stay mad at one another (“but I can’t stay mad at you for anything… you’re the harmony to every song I sing, and I wouldn’t change a thing”). However, at the end of the song, they’re still mad! If you’re going to make a whole production out of it, at least make it mean something! Check it out below:
True Love’s Kiss can save lives. Gisele, Snow White, and Aurora were all awakened by true love’s kiss. I’m sorry, but there’s no way true love’s kiss has that kind of power. Can you imagine if true love’s kiss had the power to save lives? Even worse, imagine if that’s how you find out that your boyfriend is NOT your true love? Talk about finding out the hard way…
Breaking and entering is a great way to make new friends. Okay, someone’s gotta say it: Snow White is an idiot. Who walks into someone’s cottage, falls asleep, and then moves in with the people that live there? If I walked into my apartment to see a stranger sleeping my bed, I’d call the cops and have him arrested. On top of that, the house belongs to 7 small men. Shouldn’t some kind of alarm be going off in Snow White’s head right about now?
I could go on all day here, but maybe I’ll give you all a chance to add some of your Disney “mixed messages.”
What are some lessons you’ve learned from Disney?
To continue talking all things Disney, don’t forget to check out #DisneyChat on Twitter, founded by @Caraizzle, @KratzPR, @AdamBritten, @bobaycock, and myself. Chats take place the first Wednesday of every month at 8:30 p.m. The first chat will be this Wednesday, July 6th — Talk to you then!